i feel ugly
therefore i act ugly
i spread ugly
i attract ugly
there is so much of it out there
out...beyond...spoken...projected
where does "it" come from
from
within
how do i get rid of "it"
i never asked to feel this way
ok maybe i did
if i account events of my past
i'm pretty sure i invited it in when things didn't go
my way
i feel foolish
big fool
now i can't let go
won't
but i should
cuz i'm really tired of the "it" coming
back to me
like it belongs here
inside
it doesn't
it needs to go
it needs to leave me alone
anyone contributing by putting it
in my life
will need to have a boundary line
a cicle
only i'll be on the outside
sometimes as nice as i can be
only leads to someone being disappointed
i can't reach everyone
pieces of me
there is enough
if it is enough for you
if not, look elsewhere
you'll be fine
ill be fine
there will always be those out there
out...beyond...not you...private...public
that will hear joy spoken, be subjected to a positive attitude, and sometimes even presented with love
and take that as an invitation to a bad mitten game
and smack the crap out of it
out of you
poor birdie
i refuse
to participate
i will retract first
wrestle with "it" internally
maybe write a little bit about "it"
and then release "it"
once gone
not my problem
unless...
i make it mine
"it" is a lot of work
but i'll never give up
nope
the ugly
is just too ugly for me
say what cha want
time to get off the merry go round
stop
adjust
turn
begin again
as often as it takes