a princess and her soldier

we think that fairy tales only exist in animated movies
or quirky films. but in truth, they are most likely inspired by
real life events and experiences

i'll never be a proponent of war or violence for
violence never solves anything. ever.
but...i understand why young men and woman go
in to the military as i understand passion, dreams and having goals.
i, myself, cannot function without them.  and i understand that a military
is necessary on so many levels that could not possibly be covered in any
number of philosophy classes.

still, my son, daughter, niece, nephew, brother, sister, or friend, in
the service does not resonate as a memory i would choose to make part
of my story.  however, it happens.  and when it does, i support them...
and pray for them.

why am i talking about this?  because my nephew is leaving for the Marines
within the next 24 hours.  i am both worried and very proud. whatever his
reasons for doing so, there is no turning back now.  just before he boards
that plane for California, he will have at his side, saying good bye to him, his
3 year old daughter, Layla (they call her "Love").

3 year olds are not dumb.  oh, no.  they are very intuitive, smart and resilient to
say the least.  I ask her Grandmother (my sister) if Layla's Mommy and Daddy
talked to her about him leaving for long periods at a time and, if so, how she
processed the information she received.  after all, she loves her Daddy like no
other. just look at the photos on his social network page and you can see.

she told me, "yes, they did.  Layla tells everyone now that her 'Daddy is going
to be a soldier and I am going to be his Princess.'

tears welled in my eyes
a fairy tale at its roots
a love story unfolding

yes, he may be going off to be a soldier, but i think him to be more like a
champion. i know in my heart that little girl will always truly be his Princess.
his Princess by choice, by conviction, by pure and natural love.  because,
you see,  he doesn't  have to stay connected to her, but he wants to.
he loves his Love. in my book, he is a very special Daddy and a very special soldier.

i was born a child of God
i was born to be a great man
i was born to become a Marine...
but most of all, i was born through the eyes of my Princess

Thank you, Kyle, for protecting our country and your daughter.

Ricky's Song

In a flash
Time has passed
I'm still standing in this place

I can't see you
I can't see me
We're wearing a different face

I didn't know what i was looking for
I thought if i could just keep moving
It would come to me

Reality fades into a stream
Of broken promises
And broken dreams

But when i wake up
Each morning next to you
I'm reminded while you sleep

That nothings really changed
My love for you remains
But I'm still not where i want to be

I wouldn't have it any other way
My journey without you
Just wouldn't be the same

And although i seek a different path
One that fuels my soul
And drives my heart to beat so fast

I wouldn't have it any other way
My journey without you
Just wouldn't be the same

Time takes on a different role
As we pass through and the
Days become old

I want you to be with me
Cause I'm not free without you
On this I'm sold

I've got things i need to do
Its driving me crazy
Its driving me home

To the place where i know
I can live my dreams
On the same playing ground as reality

But when i wake up
Each morning next to you
I'm reminded while you sleep

That nothings really changed
My love for you remains
But I'm still not where i want to be

avoid the mirrors

each day i look in the mirror i see a changing person
a girl
now a woman
a middle aged woman

as i watch my jowls chase my neck
and my ear lobes following suit
i realize how much time has really passed
since i was that scared little girl
trying to find my place
somewhere i fit in

whoosh, 40 years later
i don't feel old
until i look in that mirror

but i also see in all the lines
the cracks and crevices
the not suitable for bikinis anymore body...

accomplishment
sacrifices
victories
loss
compassion
hardships
blessings

and love

i always thought i would be afraid to grow old
but now i realize that its not age i was afraid of
but failure instead

something deeply embedded in me
failure was not an option
i know better today

for without failure
there would be no accomplishments
no victories
no loss
no self worth
and no love

for what would we use to measure these
things
measure growth
measure maturity

how would we be able to be humble
and grateful

all these emotions and marks of life
would be meaningless
for their is only one place for perfection
that place is not earth
but heaven

earth is just the ride, the journey, the path
we choose to participate in just for the heck of it
there is only one purpose of life...
to seek joy

and when we find trouble
discouragement
depression
fault
in ourselves and others

it is a reminder that we have veered off our path of joy

it's time to get back on track
again
and keep getting back on
until the day perfection is ours

seek joy
trust in your higher power
trust in yourself

avoid the mirrors