sometimes, i think (analyze) about why im
feeling a particular way
i proclaim this to be normal
so, i decided for this post i would write about
my weaknesses
im not talkin about weaknesses like the inability to refuse
two or three...okay, maybe more, pieces of my sisters homemade
cinnamon rolls. with all that brown sugar crystallized between each layer, filling
an entire house with its "im over here" aroma; topped off with rich vanilla
icing which drips down the sides of each soft, gooey, luscious roll, spilling over
and down between each finger as i shove them into my mouth like i've never eaten before...ever
or not being able to lift a 30 pound pail of cat litter and carry it
two flights to the basement and then walk back up the what feels like
four flights now
im not referring to my addiction to alcohol that has been in remission
for years though never leaves my thoughts for too long due to constant
reminders by people, places and things
and im certainly not thinking about my inability to say no when it comes
to someone needing help, needing something that would make them feel better
little things mostly, but some big...like time
or when a kitty needs a home and im already at cat lady status...
but i take them anyway
the weakness in me, is the weakness in you
you that gets the raw deal
you that can't catch a break
or maybe is having a string of bad luck
you that gets picked on, belittled
you that is judged without having committed a crime
not a crime of law, at least
you that gets treated by your "better half" like you are the
sole reason for their unhappiness...and you stay anyway
you that can't see how special you are, how unique you are
and how you deserve to be treated with dignity and respect
because that's how you treat others
you that doesn't quite fit the bill according to the majority
or according to your own perceptions based on lies
you that takes to heart negative comments by someone
incapable of taking responsibility for their own actions or
without regard for anyone else's feelings but their own
you, that won't give up regardless of any of these things
i soak it up
breath it in and wrap my arms around it
try to find ways to ease your pain, your burden
make you feel worthy or just give you a small break from
the madness
sometimes i don't even know you at all
never met you
but i hurt anyway
sucks the energy right out of me
i listen, i feel, i retreat deeper within myself
i concluded that the weakness in me is the weakness in you
and that the weakness in you is
me
