when the morning breaks
all blackness erased
and the day before
can be seen no more
you're still in my heart
though distant as the stars
not in space but in time
its your journey, follow the signs
as you take your own path
i seek mine and don't look back
eyes forward, peripheral vision off
each step i feel, each step i walk
i know exactly what i want
ready to receive and nurture
for what i've settled for in the past
no longer fits in my future
you've shaped me with your beauty
you've taught me with your pain
i'm grateful for each moment
these lessons are not in vain
i've no regrets, only clarity
guidelines for what i want and don't want
through you i've experienced so much
more than i had planned
i will always thank you
i will always appreciate you
i will always carry you with me
and i will always love you,
regardless
pen to paper. keys to encrypted codes. blahs to blog. i conceal my identity yet reveal my soul.
About me
- A lil info:
- I am many things to many different people. I have few titles and fewer awards but I am complete in all that I have accomplished. My most precious of all gifts does not belong to me yet I love as if. You may know me, but you'll never really know me because I cannot be anything more than what you want to see even though I am everything I need to be.
Nov 16, 2010
paper cuts to carpet cuts
monday morning
my coffee cup in hand
late for work
didn't want to turn on the stairway light cuz
the big boy was sleeping in the adjacent room
it's 5:45am
and i'm carefully maneuvering my tired body and
my morning cup of joe back up the stairs
to return to the bathroom so i can quickly
prepare for work
not running, walking.
aware of the four fur ball shadows
that are darting in and out of view
as if i've missed the segment in their
routine that requires i pet them each for five minutes.
climbing. careful. its dark.
but i can somewhat see the glow of the
dimly lit powder room so that's what i focus on.
bad move.
for what i couldn't see was the top stair
bam! left foot big toe barely (no pun intended) catches
the front of it, hurling me forward, and not very quietly either,
as i try to keep myself from slamming into the corner of the wall
coffee up my nose, feet pounding the floor
dancing with two left feet. geeeezuzzz! i wanted to scream.
i gain control and assess the immediate damage when
i reach the bathroom. phew. im good.
i contained the spillage with my clothing
staring into the mirror. ouch, i think. i look down.
blood.
all over the bathroom floor.
my left foot toe is split wide open on the underside
serious? by carpet? had to be a nail, right?
went back but this time turned the light on
(screw the boy. he can go back to sleep)
no nail. no glass. no needle. no knife. no wire. no nothing.
just carpet.
i now wear my old man slippers all over the house
they say paper cuts are the worst thing
i beg to differ
my coffee cup in hand
late for work
didn't want to turn on the stairway light cuz
the big boy was sleeping in the adjacent room
it's 5:45am
and i'm carefully maneuvering my tired body and
my morning cup of joe back up the stairs
to return to the bathroom so i can quickly
prepare for work
not running, walking.
aware of the four fur ball shadows
that are darting in and out of view
as if i've missed the segment in their
routine that requires i pet them each for five minutes.
climbing. careful. its dark.
but i can somewhat see the glow of the
dimly lit powder room so that's what i focus on.
bad move.
for what i couldn't see was the top stair
bam! left foot big toe barely (no pun intended) catches
the front of it, hurling me forward, and not very quietly either,
as i try to keep myself from slamming into the corner of the wall
coffee up my nose, feet pounding the floor
dancing with two left feet. geeeezuzzz! i wanted to scream.
i gain control and assess the immediate damage when
i reach the bathroom. phew. im good.
i contained the spillage with my clothing
staring into the mirror. ouch, i think. i look down.
blood.
all over the bathroom floor.
my left foot toe is split wide open on the underside
serious? by carpet? had to be a nail, right?
went back but this time turned the light on
(screw the boy. he can go back to sleep)
no nail. no glass. no needle. no knife. no wire. no nothing.
just carpet.
i now wear my old man slippers all over the house
they say paper cuts are the worst thing
i beg to differ
Nov 4, 2010
seeing the world deeper than topical
sometimes i confuse happiness with contentment
there are times when i truly am happy but those times
are the direct result of something specific happening
for instance,
being with friends and family
eating a bowl of peanut butter and chocolate ice cream
watching my favorite tv shows or sporting event
receiving good news
getting a new job
having a day off from the new job
blah, blah and so on
contentment is not happiness
it is peace
peace is a state of mind
a state of mind which is void of
stress, turmoil, pain, depression, a "to do" list
when someone asks me if im happy
i tell them, "yes", at times
but it depends on how i choose to perceive
things, people, opportunities, events, etc.
it is not my aim to be "happy"
it is my aim to be at peace
happiness does not take work, just a decision
peace, on the other hand, does
it takes seeing the world deeper than topical
understanding that one controls absolutely nothing
and that acceptance of any given situation is possible
and when that happens...that acceptance happens
i am content
and contentment makes me happy
there are times when i truly am happy but those times
are the direct result of something specific happening
for instance,
being with friends and family
eating a bowl of peanut butter and chocolate ice cream
watching my favorite tv shows or sporting event
receiving good news
getting a new job
having a day off from the new job
blah, blah and so on
contentment is not happiness
it is peace
peace is a state of mind
a state of mind which is void of
stress, turmoil, pain, depression, a "to do" list
when someone asks me if im happy
i tell them, "yes", at times
but it depends on how i choose to perceive
things, people, opportunities, events, etc.
it is not my aim to be "happy"
it is my aim to be at peace
happiness does not take work, just a decision
peace, on the other hand, does
it takes seeing the world deeper than topical
understanding that one controls absolutely nothing
and that acceptance of any given situation is possible
and when that happens...that acceptance happens
i am content
and contentment makes me happy
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